JUMBLE ALL THE WAY

A jumble is defined as an untidy heap—a farrago, a gallimaufry (try using those in Words With Friends). As far as my self-imposed deadline for my adventures in Blogdom is concerned, I’ve failed miserably. I’ve come up with bupkis—nada, nichts, zip! I’ve missed not one, but two of my promised Wednesday postings.

Every day, over the past twelve days, as hard as I have tried to be eloquent, yet funny—profound, yet humorous—insightful, yet witty—all I’ve managed to produce is a humungatoid medley of miscellaneous hodgepodge:

12 Paragraphs started

11 Different themes

10 Poems in free verse

9   Rhyme so poorly, it’s enough to make you scream—

8   Describe feeling Grinchy

7   Are about being a Scrooge

6   Relate to self-imposed holiday stress

5   Are thoughts on The End of the World

4   Are thoughts on how it, sadly, was the end of the world for some

3   Remember the twenty-six

2   Include the other two

1   Wishes Everyone a Blessed, Peaceful, Healthy Holiday Season from my Family to YOU!

Nick Weidner, Matt Weidner, Shivali Patel, Alex Weidner, Elyse Weidner, Adrian Andrade, Me, Ronald Weidner

Nick Weidner, Matt Weidner, Shivali Patel, Alex Weidner, Lola, Elyse Weidner, Adrian Andrade, Me, Ronald Weidner

– Stay Well –

-See You Next Week Year –

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To Camp, Or Not To Camp? That is the question…

What self-respecting adventurer (adventuress just sounds wrong) can call themselves as such if they have never been camping? Being an adventure seeker as a child, I had always wanted to be a boy scout for exactly that reason. They got to go out into the wild with pocket knives. They built fires rubbing sticks together. SONY DSCThey cooked, ate, and slept under the stars. Joining the girl scouts was just not an option for me. Besides, all my friends were boys.

It took a while, but Continue reading

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STONES FROM THE RECTUM—A Tail of Adventure

“No. We already have a dog. One is enough,” I said. Once, twice, a quadrillion times.

It wasn’t even the kids asking anymore. It was Ronald, my hubby dearest. I thought of suggesting he go get himself a fish if he needed a new pet, but then I knew I would be the one crying and humming “Amazing Grace” when it came time to flush it down the toilet upon its final journey to The-Great-Ocean-In-The-Sky. For at least an entire year, I managed to stay true to my convictions, maintaining that “Jazzie and I don’t need company.”

And Jazzie agreed.

And Jazzie agreed.

Yet, here I sit, almost three years later with Lucy lying across my feet, snoring like a two hundred pound truck driver with sleep apnea. Not a surprise, really. Continue reading

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INNER SPACE—THE FINAL FRONTIER…

…These are the voyages of a being named Donna. Her life-long mission: to explore strange new worlds, to seek out her authentic self, embark on new adventures and to push herself beyond her limitations, to boldly go where no man has gone before—

Much like the formidable Captain James Tiberius Kirk when he commanded that he be beamed from his warm, cozy starship to some harsh unknown environment, I have also decided to take a monumental step outside of my comfort zone today. Continue reading

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THANKS FOR THE MEMORIES

If I had to rate holidays in order of their appeal factor, Thanksgiving would be my number one. Why? My taste buds are the first to roar in unison, because of the food, duh… Horrified at such a base answer, my conscience reprimands the chorus, No! It’s about celebrating all the things in our lives that we are thankful for—family, friends, health, love—everything that make us happy. Actually, they are all right. And it always has a way of taking me back to the Thanksgivings of my childhood…

This happens to be a Christmas celebration in the living room with only a few family members ca. 1972

This happens to be a Christmas celebration in the living room with only a few family members ca. 1972

The only place the entire Lambo family could eat together in was a room in the basement, Continue reading

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FOUR DAYS, FOUR NIGHTS—

Alone—no food—no drink—no watch, phone, electronics of any kind—no reading, or writing—being silent—these are the general rules of a Vision Quest.

Day 1:  In silence, I was led to my spot in the forest—a small thicket at the foot of a huge oak tree—in the Jura region in France, of all places. The sunny clearing allotted to me was just about the size of my tent. This was to be my home for the next four days, four nights—How hard could it be? I thought.

Continue reading

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What Do Promises, Hurricanes, and Soldiers Have in Common?

Francis Scott Key's original manuscript copy o...As I lay in bed this morning, the Star Spangled Banner played in my head. Strange—I thought, but maybe being back in the United States and inundated with all that’s red, white, and blue, struck up the band in my brain. Who knows?

My next thought was about promises—logical I guess, for an election year. But then I thought about the promise I had made to myself to blog once a week and how I had already, after only five weeks, broken that promise. Hmmm…do you see a pattern?

 

I had chosen hump day, Wednesday, Continue reading

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A HALLOWEEN TREAT

‘Tis All Hallows’ Eve and in true scary fashion,
the wind is a’ howlin’ with fury and passion.

The moon’s begun waning, but still lights the way,
for our loved ones who’ve passed to the ‘other side’ of the bay.

Up from the floorboards, through ceilings and walls,
they knock on the windows and shriek down the halls.
There’s laughing, and singing, and regular howls;
if we didn’t know better, it might clench our bowels.
‘Tis their annual visit. They Continue reading

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SCENT of a Blog

It’s 1:59 PM PDT, Wednesday, October 24, 2012 and I still don’t have an adventure to write about for today’s blog. The old Donna would blow it off until some idea rained out of the shower head, which by the way, is where many of my ideas are spawned.

But no, today the new Donna is washed, clean, and ready to write even though the writing is apparently not ready to be written. However, since the new Donna has committed to writing one new adventure a week, by golly, that’s what she’s going to do!

**ugh, am I rambling? Did I really just say that? Well, I am a child of the sixties—at least that’s my excuse for today**

Blogging has already taught me one thing though, and that is that once I plunk my butt in the chair and begin writing—anything, even jibberish—the ideas begin to flow. Some of them are rubbish, and some are jewels. It’s all in the mining. I’m still not sure which this will be, so thanks for bearing with me.

Ahhhhh—thank the gods—here comes an idea now—I feel it beginning to prick its way to the surface—thoughts are forming, my fingers are flying across the keyboard—          LOOK—It’s a bird? It’s a plane? No! It’s durian! The hedgehog fruit! You thought it was superman didn’t you? I never promised the idea would be an over the top great one, but let’s just see what adventure this takes us on. And you have my permission to bail at any time. I promise to still care about you.

—THE DURIAN—

A fleshy fruit entombed in spikes, 

It sends one running, screaming YIKES!

See why…

What more can I say, but thank you Adrian Andrade for planting the durian seed the other day, otherwise I never would have heard of it, and thank you ALL for forcing me to write today, even if it is only a mountain of mush. Just know that my world has become richer because of you, my reader. So, what’s the worst thing you’ve ever smelled?

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AN ADVENTURE WITH THE FRANTIC FOUR

I can’t remember a time when I ever liked grocery shopping. I only do it because it’s easier than hunting or gathering. If you looked into my fridge right now, all you would find is a half gallon of milk, four eggs, and a few leftovers that aren’t ripe enough to throw out. I think what originally spoiled it for me, was shopping with four children under the age of five. Even now, the moment I step on that ribbed, rubber mat and the automatic door flings open, I twitch like a burglar zapped by a stun gun. Continue reading

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