imagesWarning: this blog entry may be in some ways extremely graphic with regard to the digestive system of the canis domesticus. This advisory does not apply to anyone between the ages of eight and twelve.

As I headed out for a walk with the girls this afternoon, I finally remembered to take an extra dookie bag along to pick up what Lucy had dropped off a few days ago just moments after I had run out of bags.  Since moving to California, I have become quite the model dog walking citizen. I am much more diligent about picking up our pooches’ do-do than I had been in Germany where, deep in the Bavarian Hansel-and-Gretelesque forests, gale force winds, torrential downpours, and blustering snowstorms had a way of breaking feces down in a matter of seconds.

IMG_0042 Not to mention that no self-deprecating    self-  defecating fox, deer, or rabbit ever complained to me about an occasional extra turd or two on their turf. And – if they had, I would have crabbed right back at them, because nine times out of nine-point-zero-zero-zero-one Jazzie would sniff out the most moist, noxious, stench filled animal droppings she could find and take a roll in it. I know. YUK! But that’s what Lab’s do…


– not the best photo, but you get the idea –

Well, now our walk takes us to the total opposite end of the spectrum – from the lush, green, often wet Bavarian landscape, complete with colossal cow-pie splatter…IMG_1477                                           to a dry, brown, dusty mountaintop, also with DI-NA-MITE views –photo (27)Now this hilltop also proposes to be the local puppy-port-o-potty, which is precisely why I feel obligated to abide by the You-poop-it-You-scoop-it law. If people weren’t diligent in picking up their poochies plops – well, I’d hate to picture it…photo (29) (3)

Which brings me back to taking that extra baggie along in order to scoop the load from the previous day’s stroll…

I knew where it was. I was certain. I had made a mental note as to its exact co-ordinates – down the path, left at the rock outcropping, third…or was it the fourth forget-me-not patch of flowers…but alas, the pile was nowhere to be found. The more I think about it though, I should have taken a picture of the spot or noted the longitude and latitude on my phone’s notebook app since lately, mental notes have had a way of escaping down the shower drain. Hmmm… The Case Of The Missing Mental Note…but I digress.

So, where was I?

Oh! Looking for the mother load. And guess what? As I searched and searched and searched, Lucy found it. DUH! Of course – a Lab doing what a Lab does best!

photo (30)



About Donna Gwinnell Lambo-Weidner

I am an adventure seeking ponderer of the mysteries of the universe, writer of children's books (represented by Stephen Fraser of the Jennifer DeChiara Literary Agency), and lover of anything involving armor, archery, or swashbuckling.
This entry was posted in ADVENTURES, HUMOR, LUCY and JAZZIE and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.


  1. Lyn says:

    LOL you must have really enjoyed writing this Donna 🙂


  2. Vic says:

    loved the graphics!


  3. I’ve had dogs that would roll in poop (as well as in any available dead sheep that had been aging to perfection in Sacramento’s 100+ summer heat); eat their own poop, other dogs’ poop, and cat poop for that Tootsie Roll dessert treat; and were generally attracted to anything nasty. I kind of miss the attitude if not the stench. My current big, boisterous Lab X–with the webbed toes to prove it–doesn’t even like to get her feet wet, let alone sully herself with lesser substances. But… she makes up for it in other ways like being the best running buddy ever and a Class-A snuggler. Thanks for the fun post, Donna, and the memories of beloved poop-rollers that have passed.


  4. Diana says:

    Maggie had fun rolling in poop in South Carolina. Not sure if it was from a bear or deer. Definitely had a gamey smell.


  5. Roxie the Outlaw says:

    Haha! That made me laugh out loud! Love the pictures, too!


  6. airline7 says:

    I miss having a dog and then I remember the things I don’t miss….bathing your stinky dog in the dead of winter was definitely one of them,but watching them go nuts over the blow dryer was fun. Ah well, we will be dog owners again one day, but not until we are retired and home more than away :). Great writing, as always, Donna!


  7. menomama3 says:

    Ew! As for spectacular views, I think the 2nd image of the alpine cow pasture definitely qualifies! Fun post. I too am guilty of not carrying enough poop bags and have gone back afterwards armed with a bag and the best intentions and unable to find the original motherlode.


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